Dating with Celiac Disease – Low Key Gluten Free

For anyone without Celiac disease, this might seem like a silly post. But for anyone that’s single at the time of their diagnosis, it really does add some extra stress to your plate! You wonder what will happen if your date chooses a restaurant you can’t eat at…will you seem high maintenance? What if you get sick on the date? Not cute! What if he drinks beer and then tries to kiss me?

Yeah…these were all things I thought about. At the time of my diagnosis, I was actually in a relationship. I had been dating him for almost 5 years so I was really comfortable with him and didn’t worry about him accommodating this new challenge. He didn’t mind looking for gluten free places to eat or asking about cross contamination. However, being that I started dating him when I was 16 and I was now 20, we were growing apart. I was diagnosed in November and come February, I was single for the first time really ever in my “adult” life. I say “adult” loosely because what did I even know about adulthood at 20? lol But you get the idea.

It’s really hard to pull off the “I’m a cool girl. I’m so chill. I’m up for whatever,” when you have Celiac. I feel like I actually am pretty easy going and low key (lol), but there are just a lot of things that others don’t even think about. Like if a guy orders a random drink and he’s like “omg try this, it’s so good” and then instead of being able to be flirty and positive, you have to be like “Do you remember what’s in it…? Hm. Okay. Hang on. I just have to google that obscure brand of alcohol and read through 16 discussion threads to see if I can have it.” Life of the party, right? And if the guy wants to pick the restaurant you’re going on for your date, you have to hope he just accidentally picks a gluten-friendly place so you don’t even have to bring it up. Because boy do you feel bad saying “I appreciate that you chose somewhere for us, but I actually can’t eat there. Can you pick somewhere else? No..not there either. Try again.”

But I actually think Celiac might make the dating process easier. HEAR ME OUT. It’s a fantastic way to test out how empathetic and compassionate someone is right from the get-go! If you bring up having Celiac when you start talking and the guy/girl seems totally put out and annoyed by your AUTOIMMUNE DISEASE then honey, I have a feeling that frog has a ton of other issues as well. It almost works as a filter. It weeds out the inconsiderate, selfish assholes before you waste more time on them! Imagine the poor people out there who don’t have Celiac and have to date that guy or girl for MONTHS before finding out they’re a self-centered jerk….those poor souls. Most people only get to see how kind or rude their date is to the waiter, but you also get to see how kind they are to you and how concerned they are about you staying safe! I mean, that’s kinda awesome, right?

I actually really didn’t have any trouble dating with Celiac. Almost everyone I talked to was incredibly understanding and I often got the “Oh yeah, my cousin/brother/friend/mom has Celiac” response. It’s amazing how many people know someone that has it! Any time a guy suggested taking me out to dinner, I just responded “Absolutely, I’d love to! Just a heads up, I have Celiac Disease, so I have to avoid gluten. I’m more than happy to suggest some safe restaurants in the area!” Usually they took me up on that or asked if the place they had in mind would work. It really wasn’t a big deal. Probably takes some of the pressure off of them not having to decide on a restaurant.

So my high school sweetheart and I broke up in February and I met my now-husband in March…sometimes that’s just how life works haha We weren’t officially a couple until June, but we did a lot of dating in the mean time! From the start, the gluten thing was just never an issue. I told him all the places I usually go in the area and we’d just pick from there. I can remember one time he even invited me over for dinner and made gluten free chicken parm! He put so much work into it and made sure that everything was safe! And it was…I didn’t get sick!

He was also super protective of me when we’d go anywhere, right from the beginning. He always triple checked with waiters and waitresses. If we were at a party and they were playing flip cup, he’d secure a clean spot for me and make sure no beer entered my zone lol And when he started taking me home to his family, he’d stay in the kitchen and talk his mom through cooking gluten free so I didn’t have to be the annoying one!

So I think the moral to the story is, if someone isn’t understanding about your disease or they don’t make an effort to accommodate you, they’re just not the one. That’s my personal opinion. If someone sees you for you and understands how special you are, they’re going to do anything and everything to make sure you’re safe, healthy, and happy. So if you’re newly diagnosed and terrified that Celiac is gonna scare away all your potentials suitors, don’t be. If anything, it’s going to make it easier to see who’s truly special and worth your time.